- Louis CK: If you raise a girl with some confidence and you send her out in the world so she feels like she can do whatever she wants, she's still going to get her face and her ass fucked but she's going to do it on her terms.
- Louis CK: She's going to grab that dick by the base and go, "I want to suck this right now".
- Louis CK: This should be your goal as a father: That your daughter only sucks a dick that she thinks is delicious.
i laugh at people who are like “we don’t need another spider-man trilogy”
no you know what movie we really don’t need
a katy perry documentary
Or Magic Mike.
I mean, does Channing Tatum really need a movie loosely based off his life? We really couldn’t think of anyone more interesting?
- [me talking on the phone in Spanish]
- White woman standing near me: God, don't people speak English in this country anymore?
- Me: Yes, and fuck off.
So I downloaded this app called “Zombies, Run!” It basically turns the exercise of running into a game where you have to escape zombies and reach special achievements; like picking up equipment from certain check points. I’m really excited to use it so I think I will go on a run tomorrow. For anyone who doesn’t know this, I am terrible at running when it isn’t on a treadmill so I am hoping that the growls of zombies chasing me will motivate me more.
Anyways, I will update on how my run goes and what I think about this application tomorrow!
have you ever just listened to a recording of you talking and then felt terrible for anyone who’s ever had to talk to you ever
Whenever I see Lana Del Ray my eyes just automatically roll.